Sunday, March 25, 2012

Here we go again!

Everybody wants a slim and trim figure with flat abs and mile long legs. Everybody is envious of that one girl who has it all. Envious that she can wear skinny jeans, itsy-bitsy shorts and fitted tops. Yes, the very same girl who eats like a pig, yet her body refuses to put on weight!
But let me tell you, not everything is as starry and rosy for tall, skinny girls either. Yep they can fit into any kind of clothing they want, their legs look fab all the time but there are also oh-so-many embarrassing moments like the following

1) You search and search and search for that one XS top that you know is there somewhere, when finally the sales person sniggers and says "Please try the kids section". All heads turn in your direction, including that cute guy shopping next to you.

2) And when you do enter the kids section (Lets face it. You have no other choice) all you find are Hanna Montana t-shirts and barbie t-shirts which you promptly feel like ripping apart.

3) You wear those 5-inch heels and find yourself towering over everyone in that place including the sales boy who looks up to you and asks "Is the size okay?". For a second you feel good, powerful until you feel everybody's stares on you. Why the hell is everyone looking at you like a clown on stilts instead of a model on stilettos?

4) You have to repeatedly, time and again face those annoying questions about why after all these years you are still thin, whether you are eating properly or not, from fat relatives you hardly know. "We have to fatten you up" they exclaim proudly and proceed to stuff 344566 sweets onto your plate.
I'll let you be fat. You let me be thin. Truce?

5) It is always assumed that you can squeeze into any small space, specially in public transports, just because you are thin. Fat aunties very easily manage to push you off your seat with their huge butts. You somehow extract yourself out of that tightly wedged space all the while telling yourself to keep breathing.

6) You are the first person people call when there is a ladder to be climbed because there are less chances of the ladder breaking. What they forget is that the ladder might not break, but if we fall we break our bones.

7) People give you a knowing look when you say you aren't hungry and they don't believe you when you say you just ate.

9) People give you an incredulous look when you say that you exercise. So how about tying your eyebrows to your nose so they don't go up and meet your hairline, when we mention about our early morning jogs. Exercising doesn't necessarily mean losing weight. Stamina, endurance, toned muscles anyone?

10) You can never find bracelets and bangles that fit your dainty, tiny wrist
When people hug you they say "OMG am scared i'll break you"
You cant recall how many times you said "I have a fast metabolism"



Jokes apart, a stereotype has been established that being thin = being sick. And I am here to break that stereotype. Have you ever heard of someone approaching a fat person and asking "Why are you so fat, do you keep eating all day long?". Never. But being thin means inviting all sorts of unwanted remarks, comments and free advice onto yourself.

There is thin and there is anorexic. Know the difference. It irks me when people use both the words interchangeably. Just because you are on the plumpy side doesn't make everyone else anorexic. Anorexia nervosa is a physical and mental illness/disorder and calling someone with a slim body and size zero figure as anorexic is downright insulting and wrong. Not everyone who is thin or size zero is anorexicBut the fact is that people do know the difference, yet they tend to refer to only women with curves as "real woman". What are the others then? Invisible? Fake? Artificial? Just because a thin body is everybody's envy, it doesn't make thin people any less "real". They are as average and real as they make 'em!

You need to feel good about yourself and your body, because you are happy with your body. Not because you feel there is someone else who is far worse than you. If the only way to feel better about your body is to insult someone else's then that's definitely not a healthy way of gaining self confidence!

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48 comments:

  1. awwww!! I love this post! people are confused about the definition of beauty. They forget it's all about your perception. I blame the media.
    http://uberchicmichi.blogspot.com

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    1. So true!!! That is why us bloggers are changing the way beauty is viewed. I love reading what other people (real people) have to say instead of just my magazines. :)

      Amy

      fashionandbeautyfinds.blogspot.com

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  2. You make a very valid point - its about time people understood the difference between anorexic and healthy.

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  3. Very true and I'm totally agreeing! Just one thing to say: GREAT article ;) xx

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  4. well I couldn't agree with you more. I am thin and I love my body. I don't care what anyone thinks or says and all of us should do that irrespective of how we look. :) there are good things about being thin too! Great post!

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  5. shouldn't we stop having stereotypes at all....i mean for anything, not just the way people look.

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  6. This is so my story! Every single point which you wrote is very true.

    All moti aunties have got this one aim...to treat us as if we haven't had food for the past many days and stuff us with so much ghee mein doobe hue paranthe etc. And even my friends irk me by criticizing my body type. There is hardly anyone who appreciates the fact that I don't have love handles (except ma and bhaiya).

    I simply loved the way you wrote it...to the point! And if next time if anyone comments on my body type I am going to send the link of this post. :-)

    P.S: Sorry for the long comment. It was over-whelming. You see dukhti rag pe hath rakh diya tha. :P

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  7. My sister has a very simuler figure to yours and she ALWAYS gets this :) I get it but a little less than her.

    Tottally agree thier is no such thing as the ideal body :)


    http://beautyaddictsguidetothegalaxy.blogspot.co.uk/

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  8. Love this post!! People should learn to think twice before they speak. I mean seriously -- if you are thin DOES NOT mean you have anorexia! I hate it when people say such things. :X
    Nice post! :)

    Xoxo.
    Surabhi.

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  9. I'm amazed that people feel the need to make any comment at all about a person's size, weight, height. Really.

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  10. True what you said, everyone needs to love their body, and also respect the way others look. As long as people are healthy, the size should not matter.

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  11. So true. I don't know why people have to comment on the way people look. I hear people saying "I hate you because you are skinny," and I think that is horrible.

    Amy

    fashionandbeautyfinds.blogspot.com

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  12. Though I'm not skinny I think I understand... I'm a petite and we have the same kind of issues too, when shopping, and with a lot of other stuff which if I start posting here will become a blog post. I go to kid sections too sometimes coz not all stores carry petite sizes and alas kid sizes don't fit me in all places... And I think so do curvy people, I know a lot of curvy friends who find it difficult to wear western clothes. But I agree when you say that one shouldn't make fun of others just to feel good about themselves.

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  13. Can't agree more. I always have a problem in finding XS size clothes and end up buying stuff in Kid's section. *Sniffs!*
    Not just the salesman, but friends too taunt us! :D

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  14. Well written, I must say! :)

    My own sister is absolutely the same body type as you and I can totally understand people being thin structurally. I have no issues against "real" girls being thin or slim. In fact, I like looking at girls like you & appreciate your fit figure.
    But what I don't understand or agree to, is the need to have models of specific vital stats or dimensions to represent a brand/clothes. In fact, most of my customers are actually on the healthy side & hence, I need to make clothes that are bigger in size (trust me, I would LOVE to make smaller sized clothes too!). Anorexia is nowadays easily related to size zero because of the modelling professions & these young girls neglecting their health & body just to make a mark in the industry. My objection is against the notion that smaller sized garments worn by thin models are more attractive to people, hence, we should all present our clothes like that. But i wanted to break THAT stereotype & present my clothes on women who are more curvy or with larger body structures just to show that clothes can look good on THEM too! And from personal experience, I have mentioned that there are more number of larger women around than thin ones. I guess you'll find out that that's true....at least in my city.
    I have no issues/grievances/envy/hatred whatsoever against thin girls. But I DO have a problem with people thinking that a garment only looks good when worn by a thin girl and not when worn by someone plump. As you see, there's a difference between the two. :)

    But frankly, I loved reading the post......I'm sure my sister will love it even more!

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  15. I totally agree with you! Love the image! :)

    xx
    E

    http://byebye-blondie.blogspot.mx/

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  16. I so agree with this. There are a lot of women who cannot gain weight. They eat normally and just don't put it on. I don't call it anorexic- I call it blessed (except for shopping in the kids department). I'm really tall myself so I get the looks for wearing heels, but I've learned not to care what other people think. There will always be ignorant people!

    http://theclosetintervention.blogspot.com/

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  17. Oh...there is another side to the fatty story??? Trust me, people are always a pain in the butt when being judgemental about a person- Fat or Thin...Does it bother them anyway? Nah!

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  18. great post...I can relate to your post as my cousin sister is just like you...and all relatives and friends used to tell her that...don't you eat at all ? who will marry you!Gosh...really people should think before they speak !
    but anyway, I really wish if I have figure like you...<3

    http://bongsbelleza.blogspot.com/
    Love,

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  19. Such a valid point! Its high time the difference between anorexia and healthy thin is understood.Being thin is desirable and so the attitude that you have nicely and to the point, criticized.

    My world, my thoughts, my musings...

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  20. very nice post. I do agree with u ppl should just accept other ppl the way they are. But I don't agree with u on one thing "nobody goes up to a fat person and asks them, do you eat all day long"???? well, lemme tell ya gal(this coming from a self confessed over weight gal who eats really less with the slowest metabolism on the planet), YES THEY DO!!!! I have had so many rude ppl come up and tell me "diet tips & tricks", "where do you get your ration (remarks)", "exercise tips" and yup "do u really eat all day long?????". Ya gal I have been there, heard that. U know both extremes of ppl go through all these things from vicious ppl who are just plain outright rude. Its sad but nowadays I give it back to them then & there...No more nice smiling girl, u hurt my feelings I hurt yours right back(only to those demonoid human beings who keep on asking for it). But in the end from me to u. I am over weight and you are thin....TRUCE????LOL

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  21. I agree completely! All women are real women and we come in many shapes and sizes!! I had the same growing up, long legs but really slender, trousers never fit right, could fit in the kids section. I didn't care though! We must remember to love and appreciate who we are!! x

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  22. So true Chandana! It is absolutely unfair to think that just because someone is thin they might be suffering from anorexia or bulimia! We cannot and should not tag only curvy women as real women! That is unfair to the others!
    Love your writing! :)

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  23. Always a strong opinion! Respect!!!!!!!!

    Dionysia - I am a fashionista
    http://i-am-a-fashionista.blogspot.com/

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  24. hehe...I agree with you but you know.....reading this makes me feel that even skinny and thin people have a sad tale to share :D

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  25. Wow, a very straight forward post and a much needed one too. Very true and loved the way you strongly put the point across :)

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  26. If I had a dollar for every time my well-meaning aunt has scolded me for working out (really?! being healthy is bad?!) or for asking me if I've lost weight, I'd be a rich lady. Drives me crazy!!

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  27. If you are happy and proud of your body and the way you look, nothing else matters!

    A great post! :-)

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  28. Totally agree with you!
    Felt awesome reading this post! :)

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  29. "all women are real women" :)
    what a fabulous quote hun
    xx
    -S
    Ginger and Lace

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  30. thats some real truth. Totally agree with you and feel good now! :)
    byw, you ve been tagged
    check out my blog :)

    Love from Bindigasm

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  31. i am soo glad you took up this topic...me and my sister size wise are very different...she is the xs and m the l size in my family...but both of us are happy ith our body types...v love to go for walks, jogs...not to loose weight but to stay healthy...but i cant even remeber ythe time people have commented tht how for me its ok to excercise but y does my sister do the same...she doesnt need it...there is this huge mental block in people's mind to associate being healthy with body size...even if i am a large size i have a stamina tht helps to run marathons every year...my sis works out because she needs to work on core strength...health and weight are two different issues...but our minds have being trained to treat both these words as synonyms....

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  32. m so glad tht u raised this point...me and my sister have similar eating habits but she is a d xs and i an the m size in my family...we both love to go for jogs, walks, swimming together....but i have lost count of the no. Of times people have commented tht y does my sister accompany me...she doesn't need it...people have this huge mental block tht associates health with body size...if i m a size m it doesn't mean i m nt healthy....my sis who us slim as what people say lacks core strength....the major fault is tht v believe tht health and weight are synonyms...

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  33. SOOOOOOOOOO true!! Thanks for writing this!! I see this trend these days to somehow celebrate the curvy girls by attacking the thin women. And Thin and anorexic are mutually exclusive!! Worst part is most of the times they are 'celebrating' the Kim kardashian type curves which influence girls to go under the knife for bigger 'assets'
    And I totally agree with sighing on the 5 inch heels! I am looking for a nice color block pumps and most of them I like are 4 inches tall..I am 5'8" and it is so difficult sometimes to get a sexy looking shoe without feeling like Amitabh Bachchan!
    Hope you are having a wonderful day!
    -Jyoti
    Style-Delights Blog
    Let's Twitter Together
    Friend and Fan on Facebook

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  34. So agree with u
    i have a similar post sitting in my drafts for a week now :)

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  35. Right on honey! Real women have body issues...it's just a fact. At one time or another (hopefully in youth so when you're a full fledged adult you can just sit back, relax, and enjoy!) every gal's been unhappy with her body. It's about letting go and embracing the good...Such positive vibes! Love your blog, keep up the awesome posts!

    xo-Julie
    Peace. Love. LOL!

    Haute Khuuture.com

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  36. I really agree with you! When you mention you exercise, you get the crazy look like, you should be eating than exercising smh! Nice post dear :)

    xoxo
    Stella

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  37. i AGREE WITH YOU!

    I think women who are slim in nature but tall can find it difficult to find clothes that fit thier frame.

    My sister is petite and slim. find clothes that fit her is really a daunting task. and you're right who wants to shop in the kids section.

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  38. I couldn't agree more. The small sizes are always the first to go and I've noticed with the petite ladies...as soon as it goes on a sale, like we're talking a minor sale in my opinion 20% off the regular price...it's GONE with the wind.

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  39. I really despise those with a high metabolism b/c I seem to get fat by just drinking water =) j/k I totally agree with everything you say here!

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  40. Dont think about people..Being STRONG IS THE NEW SKINNY! But love yourself and make yourself..working out in the gym is not only meant for fat people and people dont understand this. You build muscles and ll get the curvy body! Girls dont have male hormones to grow up and look big.

    Keep going! and love yourself!

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  41. i agree with you... very well said and everything you said is true...

    It’s a GIRL Thing

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  42. When I was younger, I was a size nothing...and I'd get the silly remarks all the time but I always had a smart mouth and would respond to things like, oh my god, you're so skinny, and I'd say, Oh my god, you're not...I am always one to speak my mind and if you come out saying something stupid, I can pretend to be just as stupid! Human beings are jealous creatures and if they see something they want, they'll try and make the person who has it feel bad. I'm in my mid 30's now so my metabalism has slowed and I see a slight jiggle in places and I'm freaking the hell out (I'm regrefully a size 4)...and yup, I am proud that I don't let my body go to hell. It is the right weight for my body and I will not apologize for that. Girl, relish your slender figure and tallness and don't give a hoot what others say! I do wish I was taller though hehehe...

    www.plentyforpennies.blogspot.com
    Vintage Collar Necklace Giveaway

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  43. I faced all the ones you mentioned except the kids and the ladder :)
    Few people relate slimness to wealth too. Poor kid, she is thin! And there are others who were looking at my tallness. They still don't know that I wear heels.
    I, no doubt, totally love my height and personality! Thanks for my metabolism!

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  44. Haha...this is soooooooooo well said Chandana..I am almost feeling as bad for you as I do of my over-weighty self...sigh, if we were all just okay with our body structure and weight and more importantly others were-this would be a wonderful world to live in! :-)

    And don't let those fat aunty jis push you or snub you around with super sarcastic and mocking statements-hit back at them once to make them STFU :-)

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  45. so true!! totally agree with everything that u have said here. And yes All women are real. :)

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  46. Both weight classes of thin and fat face issues and drawbacks, fair enough. I have no doubt that being thin comes with it's brand of ridicule. I realize that this post is emphasizing your personal drawbacks of being thin, however I can't help but feel that in your grieving you actually insult anyone who is overweight.

    The Pro's you listed outmatch the embarrassing moments:

    - "Yep they[The skinny] can fit into any kind of clothing they want"
    - "their legs look fab all the time"


    Consider the fat, their wardrobe is always limited. You sound like you have this problem with your XS sizes, but the other side of the spectrum has just as many-- if not more, limitations. You must also consider the "problem areas" that thin folks simply don't have to worry about.

    You listed specific examples of embarrassment, which seemingly does not compare to the countless hours of self-criticism most heavier people endure when leaving the house or interacting with friends. I am a Husband of a heavier woman, everyday I see her ongoing struggles with her weight, with her health, with her self-image, and with her self-respect. She would give almost anything to wear whatever style she loved, instead she's extremely limited to whatever will fit and flatter. The thin seem moderately pestered by the stereotype, but your 10 annoyances seem almost profane: to the girl who cries herself to sleep at night, to the young man with congestive heart failure, to those with weight-induced diabetes, to the clinically depressed men and women who struggle with their size.

    It is frustrating to have personalities assigned due to body type. "Skinny = sickly", "Fat = Lazy". I have empathy for your struggles, but ask that you consider every day a blessing and that you would no longer suffer these annoyances, knowing that someone, somewhere, suffers far worse than yourself.


    Best wishes,

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    1. First of all I haven't insulted overweight people anywhere in my post. The only people I've 'insulted' (for the lack of a better word) are the people who refuse to understand what skinny people go through, who ignore the fact that there is a difference between anorexic and being thin, and those who basically look at only 'curvy women' as real women.
      I really don't know how all this translated into me insulting overweight people in your eyes. Even so, I apologize

      I am on the skinny side, so its obvious that I would write from my personal point of view so of course this post is emphasizing my personal drawbacks of being thin. But just because I am writing about the woes of skinny people DOES NOT MEAN I am denying the problems of overweight people. This post is not about them at all, so their problems don't even come into picture in regard to this post. If I was writing another post about the problems and worries faced by them, then definitely I would mention all the points that you mentioned above.

      And lastly, this entire post was written on a lighter note (which is the case with most of my posts) in order to learn to laugh at yourself and also to accept your body for what it is and be happy with it. Except for the last para where I stressed about the stereotype that some people have about anorexia and size zero. I request you not to judge me based on this one post which seems "almost profane" to you. You have no idea about me or my life or what I have been through.

      I understand the emotional difficulty and struggle that you and your family must be having and I respect your feelings. But it seems to me that you are letting your personal frustrations cloud your judgement and pass such remarks on me when you have absolutely no idea at all about my life.

      Good day!

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Appreciate all your comments! :)